1969

I've had so many thoughts about a family I once knew and considering those thoughts have consumed much of my time, and considering the importance of some events, these thoughts must be included here.

Close friends of the family, from the old country, that we visited often.  For the past twenty six years, I've been hearing them, giving commands while I'm trying to work, using unfinished ambiguities such as "The next time you get a package,..." then CC, the daughter in the family, about my age, points at me to finish the command, and I did with "..f**k you."  I've gotten used to CC and her brother FF doing this to me for so long that I just say swear words to them, anyway.

But they have been going on a rampage lately, not unnoticed by the other harassers, I'm sure. CC is especially vicious.  And I had thoughts that certain events that apply to all of us are being rewritten and the rewrites are the ones I am, to put it mildly, going to forcibly agree with if I don't speak up in this way, the only way that doesn't get filtered and edited.  But, seeing that they have been scheduling, timing, posting, waking up imprints anyway, I am not taking the chance that their lies will be the last word.

The last time I saw the mother of the group was about 2007.  She came over with a friend and visited with my mother.  I was outside working, and looked for the dog.  Couldn't find him, so I asked if the dog was inside.  My mom said he wasn't.  So, I searched everywhere for about fifteen minutes, then asked again.  My mom said to keep looking. And I did. Then I came in and saw the dog in the house.  I asked where had been.  My mom said that she told me he was in the house.  I couldn't even get the words 'no, you didn't' out of my mouth before the other lady who was visiting, immediately chimed in, "yes, yes she did. I heard her say it."  Total lies from them all.  But that was how things went when those certain people visited.  When I was thirteen, I walked into the kitchen, just in time to hear my mother saying, "Don't ever say anything nice about black people in front of W(me).  He just can't stand.."  I, for once, told her to speak for herself.  And then the usual patronizing from her of, "Ooooh ja, you right, you right."  And the wink and nod my mother had to give them, as just play along with him.  Slandered.  That's the way my mother was trained by someone, she's always the first to bad mouth her own kids.

Now, to go back to 1969 at the other family's house the parents and the two sets of three children. Me, my sister G, and the other kids CC and her brother FF.
other dad-ripped out his own son's (FF's) hair
other mother-gave mother a haircut, literally
me-forced to put on g's dress by other dad because, he said, that's what women do
other dad-beat CC his daughter, with belt, made me watch, CC stayed under the covers, other dad asked me 'should I give her another one' other dad clicked lights off and on a few times, told me a few times that the same will happen to me
dad-woke up once, told other dad, before he took me upstairs to watch the beating, that other dad can hit his own kids all he wants, but to keep his hands off of his (my dad's) kids. Other dad didn't hit anyone else.
mom-got a hair cut and a yelling at
me-sitting on couch, saw other mom just sitting there, drunk as hell, I think she peed herself, but I just started laughing (and so did my mom, I think)
other mother-went ballistic, to say the least. She charged at me, screamed at my mom, "how would you like it if someone did that to your kid?" Then she told me to watch TV, and she orally raped me.

At some point, there was one of other mom's kids sitting on the stairs watching through the railings what was going on in the living room. It was FF and when he giggled while his mother was raping me, she went crazy.

Other parents made CC come back downstairs to play a game called Huskerdu, and to play nice.  Every once in a while, she'd look at me and tell me that she hates me. Other parents told her to shut up, and on top of that, they told the other kids to let me win.

Since it was so late, and they probably got my dad so drunk, they had to call one of my uncles (not sure which one, but there is one who, to this day, still visits those people, so probably him) to come and drive us home. We had to have one of my uncles (not the one who probably picked us up the night before) drive us back to their house the next day to pick up the car. My mom took some of our books, gave them to the other kids. Heard them say CC had doctor's excuse to be out of school because she had the "whipping" cough, and, to me, "you don't want that to happen to you, do you?" What a bitch.

I remember being over at that house one time a little while later when CC's cousins were there. A couple of girls who were the daughters of X's brother. I hadn't seen them often. CC herded them into her room, telling me to stay out. A while later, they came out and those two girls were just staring at me. Thinking about it now, CC must have been spreading her version of events long ago. Her mom probably encourged it. After all, the bigger their lies are, the less chance there is (and was) that they would never come around to the part where her mother turns into a rapist. If CC even knows about that.

I remember those other parents occasionally brought CC and her brother FF over to our house only a few times after that. CC had this habit of killing our turtles. She would press down on their shells, more than once, and the next day the turtles would be dead. We bought a couple more turtles after the first time, and she did the same thing. Press on their shells, then do it again after a few minutes, and again they were dead the next day. X said, in front of everyone, "she has mental problems." They stopped bringing her over after that.

1973 or so--
Years later, when I was about thirteen, the other family visited us along with their son who must have been about seven.  He was standing on a wall in a parking lot, and spit at me.  Right in the mouth.  So I grabbed him, dragged him into the house, threw him on the floor, and told the parents what he did.  X said that I had a lot to learn about being a host and how to treat guests. I said FF had a lot to learn about being a guest.  Considering all of the above, I decided not to take her advice.

1972 or so--
Other dad and other mom visited, and took sister J with them to spend the night over the other people's house.  My dad had to go over there and pick her up at about two in the morning.  She was hysterical, crying bad.  The only thing she said about being over there was that she got to type.
Scary thoughts, considering everything.

Stoebermann
1986-
I was working at a gas station with someone who turned out to be FF's friend. I hadn't seen FF since about 1973. I should have known something was up when the coworker said to me, "Somebody told me to call you B (my nickname from when I was little)." I said, "Sounds like somebody has their head up their ass." It must have been FF, because he showed up at the gas station when I was working with his friend. That's when I found out they knew each other. So, FF passed the coworker a note, and asked me what my nationality was. It would have been a strange question to come out of the blue, if it weren't for the fact that FF was there, and prompted the guy to ask me. I hesitated to answer, then FF jumped in with "Hungarian." It was the first in the attempts of the "I helped you, so now you owe me" tactics, which they still try to use. I don't ask for their help, I wish they would leave me alone.

That was probably the same night his coworker and I went to somebody's outdoor party, don't know where. I just sat around saying nothing like I usually do. This was also the year that FF got arrested for dealing coke. It was probably crack, but since he's white they wrote it up as coke instead.


1999--
After my dad died in 1999, the two parents were visiting my mom.  When I walked into the kitchen, I didn't know what they were talking about, but other dad suddenly turned to me and said, "Yeah, your father would know how to take of people like that, ain't that right."  I didn't say anything--no use, I gave him a good glare, though.  And I knew what he was doing, dead and gone, so pile on the slander.  My father smacked me a few times, both for lying, ironically--lying is what other dad's good at--and teasing, but he never touched anybody else's kids.  I wonder where the line "And didn't your father have a lot of pornography in the house when you were growing up?" came from the time I woke up in front of a computer to find out that it was some kind of chat about child molestation. I actually got to type in, they actually let me type in that "no, he didn't and it was so, so sick of them to start that kind of talk," and I got up and left.  That phony psychiatrist is the one who is spreading rewrites and lies.

1994--woke up in a large room, brown carpeting, one step in the middle up to a bar along the other side.  I wondered why I was there, and to wake me up and to be allowed to remember was different, too.  So, I wondered where I was.  Thought of being on a house boat. ? And I remembered standing in the usual way they liked to get me in, gun to my head, and I saw FF walk up to me, kind of shake his head, and took the gun from the side of my head and put it in my mouth, pointed upwards a little. His mom shouted at him, she knows he just created an imprint.

I laughed my ass off because, yeah, doing it that way would take out your brain stem.
I guess he thought he was helping, but it makes me wonder how many times someone dragged me over to her house for her to create a bunch of imprints and out and out garbage on me while I was sleeping.
A few months ago, after I started answering back to these people -- in my imagination, as they love to put it -- I remember hearing a few lines from CC saying how it was my dad who whipped her ass in her bedroom. Evidently, her mother forces even them to lie. That's her mother's biggest mistake. She forces out lies, rewrites, conversations cut and pasted from things out of the blue. Instead of just saying nothing, she has to force phony rewrites and lies.

All the damn harrassment from those people comes down to covering that mother's ass so no one would believe me or anyone else who told the truth about that night at her house. She's a rapist who is still victimizing her victim, and rounds up a lot of people helping her to do that. It's all about covering her ass, whether they know it or not.

I haven't seen, for real, those two kids for many years.  I was at other mom's house the day before I was to go to the military.  And that was something else, too.