SEPTEMBER 15, 2011 12:21 PM EDT
Nothing unusual at work or at home today. I started going into the warehouse without my glasses on. I can barely see a thing without them, but since the people there are showing me messages (photos and text) on their phones, I figure if I can't see what they're supposed to be showing me, then whatever imprint someone wants to "wake up" won't happen. They only have about a few seconds to show me these things, and their messages will just not get through. If they start talking to me, I can catch it on the recorder I always got running in my pocket.
Without glasses, I can't recognize anyone beyond about 8 feet. The one manager said hello to me and I glanced up and he was holding up his hand, not like a wave hello, but maybe I was supposed to do something depending on the number of fingers he held up, but I couldn't see well enough to know how many. There was always something about flashing me five fingers. Don't know why.
A while ago, I mentioned that they had asked me what's the worst thing that could happen and I said it would be if they dragged any customer on my delivery job into their "helping" bull crap. Then, of course, they did. So, last night I was imagining being over at X's house, along with her goblins and that guy who plays psychobabble. X's daughter asked if I wanted to make a phone call. I thought, No, because it's just a prank call where I end up yelling at people and they have some great proof of 'he's crazy and now will you help us put him away" baloney.
So, X's daughter decides to call the customer on my route. Then, I'm not sure of what I said, even if I said anything, but I heard X on the phone to the woman saying things like "he's not right in the head, etc." And the lady said she knew who she was talking to, that X was the rapist and actually used her name. X freaked out and screamed "F**k her up! F**k her up!" referring to the customer.
Strange, but I have heard X say that before. When at work and she started provoking so called harassing phone calls towards her from me. And she would say the usual "not right in the head. f****try, dead babies" or whatever.
After that phone call to the customer incident, I was hearing the usual claptrap about being forced to lie for X, and the big push of 'say you're gay' when something entirely new came to me. I always laughed at how they just took it for granted that I would always end up a nervous breakdown (they can provoke one anyway), and was thinking how useless their waste of time about the same subjects over and over is.
Anyway, I'm doing my transcribing work on the net now, and, of course, some incident is running through my head at the same time. Over at X's house again. Her and her goblins are there along with the psychobabble guy. And X's daughter is doing the usual interrogation thing. Like, "The first question is blahblahblah. And you're answer is dadadadada." Just some programming for later when they claim that I want to say this or that.
So, it came to the 'let's talk about homo stuff.' I finally had it. I told X should start talking about being a drunk for once. She didn't like it. Well, too bad. I demand that she does. As they say to me, no answer is not a good answer. You must answer, and even the slightest hint will be our evidence, our proof, that they have to report back to whothehellknows.
X is blubbering. Well, I said, she should just say she doesn't want to talk about it and that's the end of that. I asked FF if he still beats his wife. What? Any answer is an admission? That's what they pull on me. But of course, the 'No comment" or "None of your business" answer only applies to them.
I did what I should have done a long time ago. I picked up a table, lamp or something and hit the lieing bastard in the head. Gave them something to parade about in public, but so what. What if he had died? I said, "Well, I was never here." That was their popular song and dance when I think about McC's.
It's about time they stopped with their interrogation/harassment/brainwashing/scheduling for later and all their other asinine tricks and shove them. It really has been nothing but a stalemate. Same talking points and ridiculous topics over and over. I'm not going to lie for her and I'm not accepting their "new me" they got ready to go with their questions being answered by their words that come out of my mouth.
Yesterday, while delivering, I was forced to hear the same junk they try to get me to comment on, and if I don't, of course, they'll have someone speak for me and all I have to do is just nod my head in agreement. So, I laughed and thought, "You never could stop anything from happening." All of their harassment, lies, brainwashing, fake psychobabble about "all his problems are from guilt trips. He's just so sorry about how he treated so and so, that is why he thinks that he's them, and all the problems will miraculously disappear when he admits to those things" or it's the ever popular "all his problems are because he's a queer and all the problems will miraculously disappear when we force him to say it."
So, I was thinking that despite all of their harassment, they couldn't really stop anything from happening. If i wanted to go out and beat somebody up, run somebody over, rob a bank, or whatever, it would happen. And the real kicker is that they gave me a built in defense whether they realized it or not. All of their 'he's a different personality when we do this, or he's a different personality when we say this, is a perfect 'It wasn't me, it was somebody else" excuse.
Then, I started to pretend to talk to a little T. Yep. The ever popular sisterT. I remember when I saw that guy who plays the psychobabble card with the "he hated his sister so much, half of him became her" and I had to listen to that, but couldn't argue back. So, if they want a sisterT, I'll give them a sisterT.
Never know when she'll wake up. And after all, they know about her, don't they? (I taunt them) They are the ones who, probably, 'woke her up' when they had an audience, aren't they? So, if littleT goes off someday, they are really accomplices. And all those people they've used over the past 27 years have seen them play that 'different personality' card.
I just say, "LittleT and I will discuss it and get back to you." Heh heh heh. They say that I've finally cracked when I say/think like that, but they're just irked that they don't have control over that. Because, really, with all of their scheduling, timing, and the dupes they got to 'read me' (for lack of a better phrase), they can't stop anything from happening. Of course, they'll know about it, no getting away with anything, but people will wonder, "How did they let that happen?" Like when I walked around with a bleeding ulcer for six weeks. "You were supposed to be watching him," somebody said. If they say that they aren't supposed to interfere, they lie. They're all about interference when they claim that they have to script everything, and most of it is their lies.
If they want to play 'he wants to be a transtesticle,' I just gave them one that they better worry about. Too bad they can't psychobabble that one.
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