November 2, 2012 9:30pm
There's really not much different today, just more of the same.
I woke up about 6:00pm today, and as usual, before my feet hit the floor, I have to start hearing X putting on her dog and pony show. On one side are X (the rapist from 1969) and my sister T, both trying to push their transtesticle agenda on me, which is just more of their abuse from 1967-70. It was X and her husband who trained me to "want the dress" in 1967 when there was a meeting at the grade school and she just had to screw me over. That was when X took my mom and sister G to the store and when they came back, X started saying things to me like, "Look. G got a dress. You want it, don't you? You can't have it." So, of course what does a 6 year old know? It worked like a charm, her training.
At the meeting at the school the next day, they called my sister G in and asked her what games did we play at home, and before that teacher or social worker got to the next question, my sister G started calling me a liar and telling those people not to believe me because I was just a liar. She did this without any prompting. It was X's training on her. This is also probably why X always brings up my sister G's name, which I associate with the word "liar." Not that she's a liar, I wouldn't know since I've hardly seen her in the past 30 years, but the association is there for X to play with.
Sister T seems to be X's better friend in all this, which makes sense because sister T used to push the same dress crap on me back then, too. She used to call me a faggot when I was that young, and since she is 9 years older than I am...Well, you can figure out who should have known better. She painted the nails on my hand once, complete with polka dots, and told me to "go outside and show everyone what a faggot you are." And I did. And the neighbor kids laughed.
When my dad got home from work, he yelled at her and told her to take it off. She didn't have any nail polish remover so they sent my sister G to go to the store to buy some. Sister G was usually caught in the middle of these fights. So, sister T took the paint off my nails, just crying all the time. She must have been really clueless. Abusing little boys and crying about it when she got caught.
I looked up the word faggot in the dictionary back then since she used it often. According to the dictionary, sister T thought I was a bundle of sticks. Ha. But of course, she told me what it was, screamed, really. My mother pushed me out of the room when sister T got that way.
Anyway, X and sister T keep the abuse they started about gender crap, faggoty crap, and abuse in general going. According to them, that is the real me and that is the one that people should talk to and analyze. The one that I have to agree to be. Nonsense. I don't have that mentality and they know it. All of their 'copy the drag queens' training is just an extension of their abuse from a long time ago. They claim X has been talking to me all about this through the years, etc, etc. The fact is, I suspect they did take me out of the house, before I put in cameras, when I was sleeping and told to remember what happened (what they pick and choose for me to remember) as a dream. "You were just dreaming."
In real life, the last few times my mother mentioned X, about six months ago, was to say, "X says you should get the medical marijuana," and that I "should go on disability." What? I haven't smoked pot in almost 13 years. Don't even think about it unless X and her idiot kids, FF and CC, throw out an association. As for disability, I work. Despite all their harassment while I'm working, I still work.
That's what I hear, X and sister T, and their cover stories, carnival freak shows, threats, and lies. I hear this in my left ear, or brain, or whatever, but I hear their crap on the left. On the other side, the right side, is more crap that I'm subjected to. **Some voice, sister J I think, just said, "You're burying yourself."** It is that couple from the episode at McC's the store, from 1985, F and Fatso.
Those two have their own crap to hide, see October 28th post. If X and sister T are hell bent on rewriting the past into what it never was, F and Fatso are hell bent on ruining the future. Their big push is to get me to join the queers. Just join them and everything will be so much better. Nothing is getting better, no matter what I do.
They love to use the suicide thing from McC, the store episode, and apply it to whatever they want. It's really being used to control outsiders, mostly, because I'm not suicidal, but they can show that to their audience (their dupes and suckers, really) to get people to cooperate with them and read something to me, or ask me some idiotic question that has some preplanned answered from me, and all the other types of harassment I've mentioned before.
Fact is, neither side wants me to have my say. They always say, "That's someone else talking." And always a broad. How dumb. They were and still are abusive people and they are using the same tactics they used in 1967. They deliberately make me screw up, and try to train me by using the 'put on the dress and that won't happen' bait. Or, 'you are too violent as a man' has been thrown out there, too. Not happening. I can't be what I'm not, but they can replay the crap they forced on me years ago. They're trying to cover their abusive asses, and always say that I'm the one who needed to be covered up. Not at all.
Sister J seems to be used a lot. I'm guessing they rely on her to screw me up by saying trigger words while I'm working (screwing up my typing and such). I mentioned before about KS and when she put up her little finger and said, "I'm keeping that one for myself." At the time, I thought, "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" It wasn't until I thought of sister T, and when she cut her little finger washing dishes (screamed like a banshee), did KS nod and put her hand down. Some associating there with transtesticlism, too.
Anyhow, I got to go to work soon and I'm sure it's going to be a lot of intrusive thoughts. X with hers trying to make me mess up work, and her denials, and bringing up a lot of misspeaks that makes it sound like I want her messing with me, which I don't. And the other assholes, F and Fatso, making me listen to conversations which involve other people at where I work, but the fact is, I don't carry on conversations with them for real, I don't know them.
I don't want any of those people in my life. X, my relatives, their friends, they are all just idiots trying to cover their asses by using real people. All they ever proved is that they can manipulate people, and it's easy to manipulate someone they've victimized before.
Werner K Stoebermann Werner Stoberman
